Crazy Days

The last few weeks have been nothing less than crazy days. As we have run back and forth to the doctor, answering false alarms from our soon-to-arrive third child, shuttled our 3 and 4 year-olds back and forth to the grandparents, trying to finish up one camp and plan for another, we have also had the task of trying to make some of the biggest decisions of our lives.
That may be an overstatement. These may not be the biggest decisions of our lives. There are other important decisions that quickly come to mind. However, right now, these seem huge! There are so many factors and so much at stake. We have measured all of the human factors and evaluated all of the circumstantial evidence. There seems to be no clear direction.
The future sure seems to hang in the balance. I know God is in control and He is working everything for good to those who love Him and are called according to His purpose. I know that if we seek the mind of Christ we will prove the good, pleasing and perfect will of God. I know in His sovereignty, we have a real, volitional choice that has real and eternal consequences. So, despite all of my faith and assurance, I have no answer.
We have prayed for months that something would change so that everything would not have to change. We asked God to do something now that would allow us to continue in the path He has called us to, so that we did not arrive at a place in the future where that path had to be drastically changed. I know, man makes a plan but God guides His steps. Still, that is how we prayed. God seems to have provided a possible answer to that prayer, but is it really His answer or just an easy way out?
I have often said that it is in the really big decisions that God most often does not speak. When we first start to really follow God, we are called to choose between bad and good. God makes it very clear in His word what is good in His sight and what He requires of us. He makes it equally as clear what displeases Him and what we should avoid. As we grow and mature, it seems we are called to choose between good and better. It is a little more complicated to seek the better path. Paul says that nothing is illegal for Him, but not all things are profitable. Here we are seeking what is better, not just what is OK. This is where most of us live, trying to figure out what we can get away with and still be right with God. Spiritually, there is no neutral. Therefore, we can not stay here for long. Paul's tearing of the flesh is a clear sign that we are to move beyond good and better, to a discernment between better and best. It is here that we no longer ask what can I get away with and begin to ask, what is the best that I can do. What is God's best for my life. I have found, and am reminded now, that it is in this discernment that God is often silent.
Truth has been revealed and truth is required. We have been renewed and transformed and now we must live by faith. God does not give many answers here because He says to us, "I have trained you in the way that you should go. You know what is required of you. You have a picture of what I have planned for your future. Now walk in it. Choose according to my truth, by faith and not by sinful nature." In a sense we are called to go with what we know and prove that it is the will of God.
Jesus did not ask Peter to analyze the water or evaluate the storm. Peter was not called to pick a boat or make a plan. Jesus said, if you believe that it is me then step out on the water. Keep your eyes on me and walk where no man has walked before. The boat was better than the water until the water was better than the boat. The water was better than the boat until Peter took His eyes off Jesus and then He was back to the shore.
We need a word, a yes or no from God. God may require more than that from us, a yes or no to either one, a blind step out of the boat, or a patient faithfulness to the last thing we know to be true.

Be Careful What You Wish For

I'm staring out into the night,
Trying to hide the pain.
I'm going to the place where love
And feeling good don't ever cost a thing.
And the pain you feel's a different kind of pain.

These lyrics from the popular song by Chris Daugherty called "Home" tell the story of a heartbroken man who has gone out into the world to make his way, only to find that way filled with disappointment and loneliness. In the darkness of the night, he realizes that what he is longing for is what he has left behind. When his pain pierces him, he comes to the realization of the prodigal son. I want to go home.

Well I'm going home,
Back to the place where I belong,
And where your love has always been enough for me.
I'm not running from.
No, I think you got me all wrong.
I don't regret this life I chose for me.
But these places and these faces are getting old,
So I'm going home.
Well I'm going home.

I believe the song is popular, not just because it served as the "American Idol" farewell song for several seasons, but because this chorus expresses the heart of every human being. We long for that place where we feel home. The theme song to the sitcom "Cheers" used to say, "I wanna go where everybody knows my name." I want to be home, where I belong, where I am loved. Like the prodigal, we want to be in our Father's arms again. In one line he voices no regrets, but in the next he recognizes the futile and insignificant life of our own choosing. The world gets old, and when it does, we long for home.

The miles are getting longer, it seems,
The closer I get to you.
I've not always been the best man or friend for you.
But your love, it makes true.
And I don't know why.
You always seem to give me another try.

The second verse gets more to the heart of the matter. The closer we get to home, the more we realize how far away we have been. For the believer, like the prodigal, home is not so much a place as it is a relationship. As we return, we realize the distance between us and God. I have not always been what I needed to be. The distance is of our own making, our own life we chose for ourselves, our sin.
However, in the spiritual analogy, we arrive at the most powerful words in Scripture, "But God."
Your love makes true. God's love makes all things right. he works all things together for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purpose. Most important for us, He loved us enough to send His Son, who is the way, the truth and the life, that we might come home. Love always makes true, and I do not know why. Clearly there is nothing I have done to deserve another try. Grace, from a motivation of love, not based on merit. That is what the prodigal receives, and that is what God promises those who believe. So, in the heart of every believer is this song.

So I'm going home, Back to the place where I belong, And where your love has always been enough for me. So I'm going home. I'm going home.

And as we enter into the gates of home, it becomes clear that all the world has offered is not worthy to be compared to the riches of knowing Christ. All of our worldly treasure has no value in a land where streets are paved with gold, the gates are made of pearl, and there is a sea of crystal. We spent a lifetime wishing for things that were not God's best for us, and we got them. But with them come things that we do not want or desire. With them come regret, and the weight of sin, the burden of things seen and done.

Be careful what you wish for, 'cause you just might get it all.
You just might get it all, And then some you don't want.
Be careful what you wish for, 'Cause you just might get it all.
You just might get it all, yeah.

Can you hear the voice of that prodigal son ringing in your ears? "Oh, well . . ." Or is it your own voice saying, "I'm going home"?

Oh, well I'm going home, Back to the place where I belong, And where your love has always been enough for me.
I'm not running from. No, I think you got me all wrong.
I don't regret this life I chose for me. But these places and these faces are getting old.
I said these places and these faces are getting old, So I'm going home. I'm going home.